EASE Monthly Articles

I am so Angry . . .

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. By recognizing and accepting your own anger, you are on the road to controlling and releasing it responsibly.  Everyone gets angry. It is a normal emotion. The way you handle anger can affect your relationships and your stress level.

Not all anger is equal: it may be associated to feeling pressured to meet deadlines. It may be related to not feeling able to speak up.  It may be a feeling that you are “right” and the other person does not agree.  

Controlling your anger and recognizing that you are getting to the point of fury is critical for yourself and for others. You can learn how to avoid certain provocations and calm yourself down so that thoughts direct your response instead of emotion.


·         Taking a “Time Out” will prevent your anger arousal from becoming intense. If you are shaking, red in face or on the verge of tears – it is time to step back. 

·         Quiet yourself and take deep breaths. Silence is golden in these situations and stops the noise in your head.

·         Make the relationship your priority. Maintaining and strengthening the relationship, rather than “winning” the argument, should always be your first priority.
          Be respectful of the other person and his or her viewpoint.

·         Choose your battles and your words carefully.  Conflicts can be draining, so it is important to consider your approach and intention to resolution.

·         Know when to let something go. If you can’t come to an agreement, agree to disagree.

 Anger is one letter away from “danger”. All you have to do is put a “d” in front of it.  Anger can damage people’s lives and health.  Learning to release the anger and finding peace is a process. If you would like to develop skills for managing anger, consider counseling.  EASE is available to assist you by calling 800-882-1341.


Actions: E-mail | Permalink |